Sunday 14 June 2020
Dear Readers,
If you have left me a message on my contact form in the past six months, please forgive me for not responding to you.
I have just spent a couple of hours tidying up this site and found 207 messages which I was not aware had been sent to me. The result of reformatting the site in early 2020.
I do not like to leave anyone without a response, if you take the time to write to me I always want to write back with some guidance if I can or the information you have requested.
Please bear with me whilst I work through the messages, it may take me a couple of weeks to do so.
I run this blog in my spare time but over the past six months I have found my online work with families increasing to the degree that there is now a waiting list for consultations with me and a longer waiting list for assessments and intervention in the family court.
I am uncomfortable with making anyone wait for any length of time and we do try hard to put as much information out as possible which is free of charge and at low cost alongside what we do at the Family Separation Clinic. Unfortunately, the demand for our interventions means that things like the therapeutic parenting course and our new book for practitioners become delayed in delivery. We will be working out how to ensure that such things are available in as timely a manner as possible in the coming weeks.
In the meantime, I will do my best to respond to everyone who has contacted me since early 2020. Once again, if you have not heard from me, please accept my apologies for the delay.
Karen
Dear Karen, for over 2 years I am reading your blog and doing thorough research. Only because I somehow bumped onto your blog, yes, only because I did, I do now understand what goes on within the mind of my son. See, I had no idea why my child with whom we were so close his first 10 years of his life, became distant and disrespectful during 2 years prior of giving himself up to the youth protection services. Now I understand why he wants no contact with me. And no, I am not shifting the blame towards his mother. In fact, “blame” isn’t in my vocabulary at all. Rather, “understanding”, “analyzing”, and then “self-improvement”. If now I want to change my son’s feelings towards me, how will I present myself? As a lonely, miserable, unhealthy person? No. It would be similar to inviting him to live in the broken house. I am living rather healthy lifestyle, exercise, improve myself as a person, attending parental workshops, and studying, studying, studying. Reading, reading, reading. Your blog plays, not one of, but the most important part in my entire “clue” to “what happened” and “what now?”.
I live in Montreal, Canada. Here, you may think they know what Psychologically Induced Splitting is, because they do use “Parental Alienation” term, but if you just listen to them (I mean DYP and other authorities) you would sigh “My, they have no idea what real parental alienation is and how to identify it”.
If you wish, dear Karen, or should I say if you have time, and would like to hear more of my story and especially how I came up with my understanding of reality, I am always there to speak with you. Even though you must have more than enough cases already for your research, I still think that mine is unique. Because out of 4 children, 3 became alienated BUT my youngest (who is considered developmentally delayed) is totally on my side, and he is seeing the reality the way it is. He still can’t live with me, though. The mother rejected him and sent him to live at the foster care, and is trying to convince everyone that it is me who had turned the youngest against her. Well, the dark curtains one hangs around you will eventually fall off. They are starting to fall, I must tell you. They begin to see who I really am, but it is so hard for the social workers to accept it… so it goes slow.
Thank you for reading my comment
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Oh, it is probably not clear. When I speak of my son who is alienated, I mean 16 year old; when I speak of another who is on my side, I mean my youngest, 14 year old. Two other children are adults, 22 and 26, and they aren’t blood-related to me.
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Dear Karen,
Just to say I hope you are keeping well.
Also, thank you for your posts – wonderful as they are.
Apologies, for ‘another’ message to read 🙂.
Take care,
Pam
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