An online development course for alienated parents and their families with Karen Woodall
Thursday 2nd December 2021
Thursday 9 December 2021
Thursday 16 December 2021
Each session runs for two hours from
16:00 to 18:00 GMT
£180 Inclusive of Tax
You can check your local start time here (just click the link and enter your city in the blue box):
About this course:
Children who hyper align with a parent and reject the other in divorce and separation are usually in the age group 8-14 years. This is because this age group is in a stage in which their sense of self and personality is under development and the ego is not strong enough to regulate the anxieties which are generated by the experience of attachment disruption in family separation.
What we know about children who experience these difficulties, is that they can be helped when one of their parents is able to understand their experience and in response, hold up a healthy mirror. When the holding of this mirror is consistent, the child who has suffered from induced psychological splitting which is demonstrated by aligning themselves with one parent and rejecting the other, can experience an integrated sense of self which assists in recovery.
In order to hold up a healthy mirror, the parent in the rejected position must first address the reactive splitting that they are likely to have suffered. Reactive splitting, which occurs when the child rejects, (often accompanied by false allegations), can cause a parent to feel natural reactions such as anger, bewilderment and shame. These feelings, which are normal in the circumstances, can become blocks and barriers to the child’s recovery as the parent refutes the allegations and shows the child their reactive feelings. In these circumstances, the child withdraws further, struggling with their own guilt and shame and begins to split off their feelings further.
Restoring health to rejected parents begins with an understanding of what has happened internally and how that has become entangled with the child’s own splitting reactions. When parents are able to map this splitting across the family system, their own reactive splitting can integrate and they can begin the work of developing the healthy mirror needed by the child.
Parents who have healed reactive splitting can then learn to apply the skills of therapeutic parenting. This is an approach to parenting children who are suffering from attachment disorder due to being emotionally and psychologically harmed. Alienated children with therapeutic parents, are shown in evaluation, to be able to recover quickly from the underlying harms which have caused their rejecting behaviours.
On this course you will learn:
- What psychological splitting is, how it occurs and why
- How to identify your own reactive splitting
- How to integrate split thinking in a fractured landscape
- How to build integrated thinking strategies
- What to embrace and what to avoid when rebuilding health in the face of alienation
- How to build the healthy mirror your child needs
- Mentalisation strategies for mirroring health
- The power and importance of consistent mirroring
- How other parents have used integrated mirroring to bring their children back to health
- Therapeutic parenting – an integrated skills set
- Building a consistent communications strategy for recovering your children
- Working with the counter intuitive approach necessary to enable alienated children to withdraw their projections
- Staying healthy amidst the chaos caused by psychological splitting
Based upon successful work with many families around the world, Karen Woodall will share with you the deep knowledge of how to recover children from the nightmare landscape of psychological splitting. Karen has helped families to rebuild health and wellbeing with children of all ages and has developed a structural approach to working with alienation which is easily translated into strategies which can be used by parents.
‘I have worked with Karen Woodall for two years now and both of my children are back in our lives and thriving. One of my children was alienated from me for ten years and she is clearly suffering the impact of that. With Karen’s guidance, I am working to address her attachment difficulties, which I now understand and recognise. Karen’s guidance works, it helps children to come home and then heal. It has been invaluable to me to do this work and understand and feel skilled as parent again.’
Emma, Mum to two children aged 16 and 19.
‘My children are both in their thirties and I despaired of ever seeing them again. I have worked with Karen for six months and am delighted to say that I seeing them both regularly now. Working with therapeutic parenting skills, I have begun to understand how they have been affected and I can help them with confidence and see the difference it makes. I am recovering a sense that I can do something about this nightmare and that makes all the difference in my life’
Jack. Dad to two adult children aged 32 and 37.
This course will be recorded and can be purchased without the interactive element from December by parents and family members in Australia and New Zealand.
Purchase of tickets to this course offers access to the recordings by all participants for up to one month.
Live discussion sessions will be held on each date, these will not be recorded.
- This course will be held on Zoom.
- To gain access, you must provide a valid email address along with your name and PayPal order reference number (you will receive this by email from PayPal after you have made payment
Whoever can help,
Do you have people in the United States that works with you who I can seek advice from or do I need to set up a time to talk with someone here who can guide me in my particular situation with my now adult children who I have been alienated from. My youngest who is suffering an identity crisis and has reached out to me via Instagram messages but extremely combative. She who now identifies as a he is wondering if borderline runs in the family and everything they are saying makes me think they think they have this issue. I believe with all my heart is induced psychological splitting from alienation. I want to help and want to share this information but not sure if I’m supposed to or not.
please email me at email@example.com and I will send you the names of people we are working within the USA. Kind Regards Karen
There may be many good reasons why not to attend this course, but they are not good enough.
It’s too late they have had their minds contaminated against me.
The Ex will see that I fail
It is too painful for me to consider, I don’t want to go through it all again
It won’t make any difference
The Court order says that I mustn’t
I’m here and waiting they know where I am
They made the wrong choice, they will have to live with it
That’s all in the past, I’ve moved on
The emotional strain is too great, I have my own health to consider
I have another family now
My current partner doesn’t think it is a good idea
I don’t want the children upset further
I am the victim here.
Nobody can teach me anything on this subject that I don’t know already know
In my case it is futile
I can see you are suffering and we am sorry for that. Your behaviours and your concerns may reveal that.
This is not about your despair nor about the faults of “society” of which there are many, nor the views nor ill deeds, nor mental failings of your Ex.
It is about honing your inherent skills to save and repair your parent/child attachment. It is about building you up to be stronger and more confident more resilient. It is about replacing pessimism and despair with a new found spirit and belief.
Whatever your children might say, they have a need to feel your care and attention. The good parent/child relationship is still there even if temporarily locked in some psychic withdrawal.
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Would you have people in Greece working with you that we can refer to? I am a Counseling Psychologist trained in rogerian cng and CBT and now o schema therapy. I am desperate myself…