On March 31st 2024, the Irish Mail on Sunday published an article about me in which they claimed that I was found unfit to practice in the UK, the intimation in the headline being that because of this I was now advising the family courts in Ireland.
It is untrue that I was found unfit to practice in the UK by BACP or anyone else and the Irish MoS has today published a correction which clarifies that fact in the context of my work as a psychotherapist in the UK, where I was recently commended by Mr Justice Keehan in the High Court of England and Wales
The distortion of the narrative around the serious harm caused to alienated children, increases the suffering of parents in the rejected position, especially when headlines such as this are gleefully resposted around social media by those who support the very parents who cause such harm. Some of these people behave like school yard bullies mocking and belittling others including me. This behaviour is well recognised in those with little insight into the harm their allegations cause others who, despite the commendation I received last year, prefer the media’s often distorted version of me. As one of the mothers featured In the recent Channel 4 Programme ‘Accused’ about the Hampstead Hoax, said about being accused of satanic ritual abuse –
For any normal person, a high court judge, putting out the truth of the matter, should have stopped this in its tracks, but, for these people, who came with the express belief that this was a conspiracy, this was a cover up, it actually fanned the flames.
Accused – The Hampstead Hoax, Channel 4
The widespread denial about the serious harm that children suffer when they are being triangulated into adult matters in divorce and separation, is part of the same dynamic which leads to belief in conspiracy theories such as the Hampstead Hoax. In this respect, the patterns of behaviours are denial of everything which does not fit a personal belief system, even in the face of evidence which contradicts that. Sabine McNeil, who was sent to prison for nine years for her part in perpetuating a campaign of harassment against the families in Hampstead, demonstrates the power of that defence in the documentary about the Hampstead Hoax and there are many on the internet, whose behaviours are eerily similar to that which we can observe in the interview with her.
Defensive beliefs are strong drivers, they protect those who hold them from the intolerable truth and can lead to attacks on others because the purpose of this behaviour is designed to make someone feel bad, so that the protagonist can feel better. Which is why anyone coming too close to exposing the truth about alienation of children, which is that some children can be seriously harmed by their mothers (and fathers) in divorce and separation, is at risk.
The attacks on those who work with abused children of divorce and separation are now constant and fuelled by campaigners who rely on research which is based upon the self reports of (usually) mothers, some of whom have been found to have abused their children. Presented as fact and often out of context, this research has led to concerns from leading legal people about the media reporting which flows from this and the manner in which it impacts upon trust in the family law process.
There is no doubt in my mind that the media reporting about my work over recent years has been focused upon causing as much reputational damage as possible by those with fixed and often ideological beliefs about the family courts. Whilst I am aware therefore that this clarification about my work from the MoS will not change anything in terms of the bullying and infantile behaviours of those who hold these beliefs, for those children whose wellbeing depends upon practitioners to keep working in this space, clarifications such as this are important because it means that media information is based in reality and not upon false claims.
I am therefore pleased that the Irish Mail on Sunday has clarified its errors to ensure that the public are properly informed, rather than being misled by the distorted narratives emanating from the same people that children are being protected from when the family courts take action.
The Lighthouse Project – Circles, Seminars and Support Group News
Listening and Learning Circles
Our listening and learning circles support you in your development of therapeutic parenting. Each circle begins with a 45 minutes presentation and then moves into discussion and learning which is facilitated by Karen Woodall. Please note that you can buy one ticket and share the link with two other friend/family members.
15th April 6-8pm UK time
Identification with the Aggressor
Understanding Children Trapped in Control Dynamics After Divorce and Separation.
29th April 6-8pm UK time
Enmeshment in the Lives of Alienated Children
Understanding Children Trapped in Boundary Violations after Divorce and Separation
Cost £40 per ticket
BOOK HERE
Spring Seminar Series No 2
Think Like a Therapeutic Parent – Understanding, Writing, Communicating, Signalling and Managing Your Relationship with An Alienated Child
Alienated children are suffering from disorganised attachments due to the situational pressures upon them caused by divorce/separation and/or a parent’s influence due to psychological/psychiatric issues. Whilst many people claim that children’s alignment and rejection behaviour is caused by high conflict, clinical work with alienated children demonstrates that this misunderstands what is happening in the child’s world.
Alienation of children, when experienced close up, is seen as a defensive response to the trauma of the child being driven to regulate an unpredictable caregiver in order to stabilise the family system and regain a sense of safety. For children whose world is turned upside down by family separation, the onset of the alignment reaction might be slow at first or it might be sudden, the child may be able to tolerate movement between homes or may completely withdraw from one parent becoming hyper aligned with the other. The path to alienation is unique for each child but the common denominator is situational disorganised attachment behaviour which appears after the child is exposed to unpredictability in the family system.
Disorganised attachments are well recognised in the trauma literature as arising in children who are neglected or abused. The Family Separation Clinic understands alienated children as suffering from both neglect AND abuse in the relationship with the parent they are driven to regulate. This is because this parent neglects their emotional and psychological needs in favour of the coercion of the child to regulate parental need, whilst simultaneously causing the child to feel fear and anxiety about their other parent. This double bind position causes the child to enter into a hyper aligned state of mind in which their fear of abandonment by this parent, is calmed by mirroring back to them a shared animosity about the other parent who is now placed at distance. This fused, dyadic relationship response, which flags serious boundary violations such as enmeshment, can cause a long term impact upon a child beyond the rejection of a healthy parent capable of providing healthy care.
Therapeutic Parenting is an approach to working with alienated children which has been adapted by the Family Separation Clinic from work with abused children who are fostered and adopted and pioneered in mild to severe cases of alienation of children both inside and outside of the Family Courts. Based upon successful work with families where children have been severely alienated, including those making serious allegations against a parent, this approach works effectively to heal the parent in the rejected position from the reactive splitting trauma which is caused by the child’s rejection, to build powerful skills for thinking and responding to alienated children’s disorganised attachments therapeutically.
What You Will Learn
- How to recognise projections and persecutory patterns of behaviours entangling your child
- How to spot traps being set by projections and avoid them
- How to understand what your child is thinking
- Where your child goes when they enter into psychological splitting
- How to identify where your child is on the alienation journey from onset to recovery
- Mapping, mentalising and mobilising your key responses to children’s disorganised attachment behaviours
- How to use words to connect with your alienated child
- Modelling critical thinking from near and far
Delivered by Karen Woodall a specialist in treating alienation in children through use of therapeutic parenting both inside and outside of the Family Courts, this second in a series of Spring Seminars, focuses upon helping you to reframe your thinking from that of victim survivor to skilled and confident therapeutic parent capable of responding to the changing needs of alienated children.
Think like a Therapeutic Parent is part of a series of seminars based upon the parenting hand book by Karen Woodall ‘Therapeutic Parenting for Alienated Children, which will be published later this year.
Date April 13th 2024
Time 16:00 – 20:00hrs (UK time)
Cost £60 per person
BOOK HERE
Lighthouse keeping: Survivor support group
An online therapy group for parents of alienated children faciliated by Karen Woodall
This is a rolling therapy group which is open again for new entrants and will be delivered on Zoom, in 6 x two-hour sessions, on the following dates:
- Sessions will begin at 17:00 UK time.
- Tuesday 16 April 2024
- Tuesday 30 April 2024
- Tuesday 14 May 2024
- Tuesday 28 May 2024
- Tuesday 11 June 2024
- Tuesday 25 June 2024
To check your local start time, please click the link below, ensure ‘Date’ is selected, and enter 17:00 – 2024-MM-DD – London in the right-hand boxes, here: https://dateful.com/time-zone-converter
NB: The start time is set to accommodate attendees living in UK, Europe, USA and Canada time zones, however those living in other parts of the world are welcome to attend this course.
A Zoom link for this event will be included in your order confirmation. This link should be used for all sessions.
Cost £240.00
About this course:
Based on contemporary trauma theory, Lighthouse Keeping is a way of reframing the reality of being a parent in the rejected position away from helplessness to an active and positive mindset.
Beginning with an understanding of trauma and its impact, this course is designed to jump-start the move, from reaction to the trauma of being rejected, to responding to the needs of the alienated child.
Led by Karen Woodall, this group will compliment the work undertaken in Holding up a Healthy Mirror or Higher Level Understanding Courses by offering grounded techniques for mentalising and responding to the trauma of being the parent in the rejected position. This course will be useful to you if you feel helpless, are suffering from symptoms of anxiety, are just entering the process of being a parent in the rejected position, or are supporting someone in this situation.
Please note:
A Zoom link for this event will be included in your order confirmation. This link should be used for all sessions. Please contact parenting@familyseparationclinic.co.uk with any questions you may have.
You can find our terms and conditions here
Karen Woodall - Psychotherapist, Writer, Researcher, Trainer 
This is ridiculous.
On Sun, Apr 7, 2024 at 8:25 AM Karen Woodall – Psychotherapist, Writer,
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I am so pleased you fought this pathetic piece of journalism, Karen – and got your clarification. Your battles with the ideological extremists are similar to the battles rejected families face working through the Family Court process, to gain understanding and support from those professionals who are supposed to protect children from harm.
As partner of a father who has been, over the past 12 years, battling ‘full’ rejection and ‘partial’ rejection, we feel like it’s been 2 steps forward, 1 step back over much of those 12 years. But that gradual forward trajectory is definitely there and we now feel that we are very close to the full resolution, bringing (at least one of his children, his youngest) to a place of safety.
Without your work this just wouldn’t have been possible.
We wouldn’t have known what we were dealing with.
We wouldn’t have had the education & encouragement to keep going.
And we wouldn’t have had the published judgements or the articles in trusted publications such as Family Law Week to be able to use in our case to demonstrate precedents.
And our judge in the lower courts & our Cafcass officer, wouldn’t have had the training and previous cases to follow.
We recognise that in the past 3 years there has been HUGE progress & are very excited about your continuing work this year.
So know that all rejected parents & those trying to protect children who are being emotionally harmed, are incredibly grateful for your work & stand behind you, cheering you on. You may not see us often, but there are hundreds & thousands of us holding you up & willing you on.
Thank you.
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unfortunately the continuing mysandry by alleged professionals against fathers alienated from their child/dren based upon FAS ana False Allegation Syndrome is at epidemic levels across GB.
The need to destroy the parental relationship between father and his child/dren is driven my gender discrimination and racist ideology carefully nurtured by white male hating CAFCASS and other so called child protection organisations. One must also include psychologists, psychotherapists and others who further demonise white male parents.
these man haters perpetuate the series psychological impact creating such damaged children and teens they should all be held to account!! Sadly, these advocates of child abuse escape all forms of justice.
the family court system is in need of a total root and branch review to address such child abuse and abuse of a fathers right to a family under Human Rights legislation.
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